Decisions, Decisions, Decisions..

June 2, 2011 Leave a comment

It may be too early. It may be really too early. But I just couldn’t avoid feeling a bit dazed looking at the Republican Presidential hopefuls for 2012.

I am sure the Republican primaries and caucuses will be very interesting to watch as the final field of candidates starts its campaign and as candidates continue to drop out one by one before the convention.

In that context, I thought I would pick the most prominent hopefuls that are in the fray as of now (there may be 4-6 more hopefuls whom I have not included because they are not too prominent yet) and create a decision tree. And just to add some humor, I have tried to list the Top 3 things that come to one’s mind when they think of a particular candidate.

Suggestions to add more spice to this are welcome.

GOP2012

Filed under Humor - General, Pictures, Politics - General

Kahn’t he be Bak?

May 20, 2011 Leave a comment

Yes. He Kahn. That’s what everyone thought. Everyone thought he Kahn get away with this easily. But looks like so many madams are coming out with maid up stories now, that it makes it absolutely impossible for the man who once thought he Kahn save the world with his economic development aids, now Kahn’t even save himself from getting ‘AIDS’.

This “Stos” Kahn guy is an epitome of hypocrisy. I don’t care if he is a Socialist. The moment his colors are faded, he looks like every other hypocritical, horny old rich guy. Firstly, his $3000/night suite that will get questioned. Then his attempt to get on a maid forcefully. I Kahn overlook his conscientious and libelous affairs because they are conscientious and I am not even going the moral road. If his wife Kahn, for whatever reason support and stand by him, it is none of our business to judge him morally. But this episode was a different matter altogether. One thing that certainly gives me some relief is the fact that a poor immigrant manhattan maid Kahn bring down a future President and Kahn hope to be served fair justice in this country. No matter what I feel about certain other policies of the land, this simple fact that justice is available for all makes me happy.

While staying with the maid theme, what’s up with the Governator? He sure Kahn be Bak. Right? And in what a shameful way! Another disgraceful end to a powerful man. Was he so self-indulgent that he failed to look through the situation and lived with the knowledge that your son is right there but you couldn’t do squat for 10+ years to publicly embrace him? And above all, to not share the situation with your wife when she stood by you during your difficult times?

Sure, he is Bak. Ha. Well.

While this blog post is published, Kahn gets a bail to move into an apartment even though he is indicted by a jury. While in other news, Kanimozhi doesn’t get a bail. The latter may have more to do with politics than any real justice. The fact is that if Kanimozhi deserved to go to jail, then there are so many other people that need to be sent in too. For those of you who want to argue that at least sending one crook in is better than nothing, I just say, if you really think this is going to change things, I am sorry, I don’t share the same optimism.

Kahn gets bail while Kani goes to Jail.

Filed under Humor - General, Miscellaneous

Royal this, Royal that and a Royal app.

May 2, 2011 Leave a comment

“You look your best..”, says the Dude. “What ‘s that scaffolding like stuff behind you?”.

“Oh..that’s Pippa”, responds the not so shy lass..”But, is my best good enough for your Grandma?”.

“I wouldn’t know. Would I? But she is at her blithely best right now. Just look at her!”..A mild pause. “I know Pippa. But what is she holding?”.

“Of course, I know she is stiff lipped and doesn’t slip. Rather annoying at times. I won’t learn to get used to her..”. Shrugs her shoulder. “That’s the Train.. My dear Arthur!”.

“Please not that name. Not in front of Elton John”, wipes a wry smile off his face. “Hope it isn’t going to be Rocket Man today. You look beautiful by the way”.

“Awww” blushes. “Did you have a haircut after the rehearsals?”

“I did”, blushes. “Why do you need the Train ?”

“I don’t. But I am supposed to need the train. Haven’t figured out why.” Takes a deep breath. “It is almost like your jacket. I can’t seem to find any useful embellishments there although there are plenty of them..”

“I..err..there is a reason for that you know”, whispers. “History and Tradition”.

“Can you stay quiet for 30 minutes? The Priest is ready”, whispers in a hurry.. “He is going to ask us to do the vows”.

“Who?” “What?”

“The vows”..through the corner of the eye..”Wedding vows”.

“Oh..!”, looking directly at the priest..”Do I have time to prepare my vows now and all I need is 5 minutes. I will give them to you”.

“Use my iPad. There is an app for Royal vows..You can punch in your inputs real quick and you can have your vows ready in under a minute”, says the Priest with a naughty smile. “By the way, I have a weakness for Hats. So, please make it fast”.

“Sure”.

And a few minutes later, the Dude and the Dudette or to be precise, the Duke and the Duchess were announced man & wife officially.

Royal this, Royal that and a Royal app

Filed under Cartoon, Humor - General

No comments..

April 26, 2011 Leave a comment

I will give some benefit of doubt to the guy who came up with the idea. May be he really wanted to mix some good message related to road safety along with his usual frantic call to the fellow citizens of his town. Now if this whole honking thing itself is as ‘unevolved’ an idea as Donald Trump pointing out that Robert De Niro is not necessarily an Einstein, then the way the Church Billboard guy phrased it, it sure makes Texting while driving a sure shot method to get to God quickly. This is from a church in Alabama.

No comments

While I was ready to publish this post, I had a crazy idea to do some research on my new found ‘theme’. So the first think I did was to go to Google. Then my first step brought me this…

I actually found this church through Google..

Then more…

Medium or Rare? Well done Please.

What? Is the suggestion then to kiss a Boy in order to go to heaven?

Yes. Free Coffee sounds like a great deal.

Ok. No Comments.

This one is actually brilliant!

How many days of free trial period do I have?

Note: Please be seeing the humorous side of this post and not troll me for no reason. Thank you.

Filed under Humor - General, Pictures

Final Prep

April 2, 2011 Leave a comment

Filed under Cartoon, Cricket, Humor - General

How to Prepare yourself for a big cricket match…

March 26, 2011 2 Comments

Filed under Cricket, Humor - General

42nd match – Random collection of thoughts

March 21, 2011 1 Comment

Watching a not so consequential ODI cricket match on a Sunday has its own benefits, especially in a web 2.0 world. You tend to have a lot of time to express your thoughts into a vacuum called twitter, where a few may pick those up and a few may miss them, but you get the satisfaction that you have said what’s in your mind at that moment. In many ways, these momentary thoughts (tweets) are uncorrupted by what happens next and hence not influenced or biased. They are how exactly you feel at a given point of time. Even if you are trying to add a humorous or a creative twist to your tweet, it still is based on that moment, unlike a blog post where you have the opportunity to collect all your ideas about a particular incident or topic & present your conclusive view in a much more balanced way.

This blog post, is an attempt to present a somewhat humorous side of the Ind vs. WI  (played on March 20 at Chepauk, Chennai) match’s proceedings through some  tweets from my timeline (sorry if I don’t give individual credits to the people who actually tweeted them  - because I am not doing a cut and paste but trying to jot down from my memory)..

Most of these tweets were from rameshsrivats & jhunjhunwala while some were from me & vamseekamana.

  • Some teams are born powerplay. Some teams achieve powerplay. Some teams have powerplay thrust upon them. (On India’s batting batting power play being taken at the 46th over)
  • Munaf Fielding Rule for all batsmen playing against India: If you hit the ball towards Munaf you should run n+1 runs where n=no. of runs you would run when Munaf is not the fielder. Exception: When Munaf is bowling, remember n->-1
  • If Muralitharan can turn the bowl even on Moon, then Munaf Patel can bowl wides even on Moon’s surface..
  • Well played West Indies. It is nice to have friends like you in the opposition (after the loss)
  • West Indian Collapso (as the WI batsmen began to collapse)
  • Darren Sammy is going to kill himself. Getting run out by Munaf is the ultimate humiliation for a Batsman..(after Sammy got run out in Munaf’s bowling)
  • Ravi Shastri is a software and not a human being (On Shastri’s cliched and predictable commentary)
  • Somebody get a wire because Shastri is about to have a feeling that this match is about to go down to it (again on Shastri’s cliched commentary)
  • I hate you Ravi Rampaul. May people throw Uday Chopra DVDs at you (On Ravi Rampaul’s wicket taking spree)
  • I hate you Ravi Rampaul. May you get acting lessons from Arjun Rampal (On Ravi Rampaul’s wicket taking spree)
  • Sreesanth’s exclusion from team is just because of election code of conduct in Kerala (based on a comment from Shashi Tharoor)
  • The Chennai people are bored.With this match, they expected a Rajnikanth film. So far it has unfolded like an Uday Chopra film (when India was going at a slow pace with Yuvraj/Kohli and Dhoni were batting)
  • Shastri : So Dhoni, how has the World Cup campaign been so far? | Dhoni : Well off course.
  • Today is a big day. India vs. “What Columbus thought was India” (before the match)
  • “Simon Taufel” – Anagram – “Fault is on me” (after Simon Taufel failed to call for a TV umpire review on what looked like a clear run out)
  • Chennai fans. Leave now. Else Autokkaarans will charge you triple rate (after the last WI wicket fell)
  • In a live demonstration of The Law of Unintended Consequences, Aswhin is making Harbhajan look ordinary (on Ashwin’s & HBS bowling)
  • Pollard gone. Well done White Dog (when Pollard got out a few moments after a white dog was spotted by the sight screen)
  • I think Ponting would prefer to go to Mirpur for QF given his TV history in Ahmedabad

Filed under Cricket, Humor - General

To Suzan Amma

March 17, 2011 1 Comment

From: Me

Dear Suzan Amma,

Greetings. You sure know me even though I don’t know you. I received your god blessed mail and I have only four questions to ask you before I make my decision. To make it easier, I have posed my questions on the same mail you sent, which I am attaching herewith for your convenience.

Awaiting your response in the name of God Almighty.

God bless you, your family and all of us..and while he is at it, may he also be made aware that Japan has had enough in the past one week and it is time he stops messing with the nuclear reactors.

Sincerely,

Ganpy.

Response to Suzan Amma

Filed under Humor - General

Oscars 2011 – Even you could have hosted it!

March 1, 2011 3 Comments

Oscars 2011 - Even you could have hosted it..!

Have some humor and take it with a pinch of salt. Will you? I like both Franco and Hathaway. They just had an off day…

Filed under Cartoon, Humor - General, Pictures

Gates and Leaks – Leakage 2

December 10, 2010 Leave a comment

Read Leakage 1 here before you start this :

What would you do when someone steals your diary and publishes every single page of it on a public domain (a.k.a on internet)? I know most of your diary pages may be of Wimpy Kid nature, but still there could be a page or two that could offer some ideas for an HBO or Showtime late night series…(if you are of the serious diary writing type)? Or let us say, someone publishes a record of your phone bill with details of every single call you made (which number and the recipient’s name, etc..)

Now take that scenario and compare it with another what if scenario. How would you like to read someone else’s diary as procured and published as above? or their phone bill? I bet your reaction is different in both the above scenarios. I am not talking about righteousness or lack of it. I am just talking about the most natural human reaction.

When you extend the second scenario above to a situation which involves a criminal – a murderer or something, what is your reaction? Now throw in a few questions such as righteousness to do so and all that. Let us say you are in the middle of deciding to publish the data procured through this murderer’s diary and his phone bills. Will you publish every single page and every single data or will you make a more analytical call on what to publish and what not to? For example, assuming there are a few pages in the diary that are neither related to the murder already committed nor the murder being planned, but instead are focusing on petty neighborhood politics where details of how each person hates another (including snippy comments and name calling details), what would you do?

Ok. Now this is where I was stuck and this exactly is and was my dilemma when the #Cablegate broke out. I have to admit I still do not approve of this set of leaks that this Australian decided to publish. I was aghast and extremely supportive of the Iraq/Afghani war related leaks. But diplomacy leaks – hmm..not sure. Anyways, when I started the original post, things were a little different. Now with Paypal, Master Card and possibly Visa & Amazon buckling under the pressure of a certain big brother, all I can do is worry about the current state of fake democracy we are living in. I don’t know how different this fake and convenient (convenient only because you do it when it suits you but change to a dictatorship mode when it doesn’t suit you) democracy is from a not so pretentious Chinese dictatorship. So with freedom of speech at stake, the whole issue of Gates and Leaks has taken on a different color and significance. Now, where does it go next and what other dangerous dimensions is it going to add to its skin, is anyone’s guess. But I am pretty sure that the big brother is hoping that, with the Ozzie behind the bars and with Interpol dancing to their tune all the time, it may just be a case of letting time take care of making people forget this issue  - Just like that.

(Leakage stops here for now…)

Filed under Humor - General, Miscellaneous

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